Why Do I Suddenly Relate to Monsters University, Of All Things?

I can’t remember the first time I saw Monsters University. Probably a good thing, because if I have to deal with any more memories of the crayon muncher known as my “younger self”, I would need therapy more than I do already. I definitely didn't see it in theaters; 10-year-old me was too busy making random noises while running around and whacking his younger brother with a plastic lightsaber.

I know for a fact I saw it a couple times as a kid. Vague memories of the movie playing on the portable DVD players we had hooked up to our car seats, the device already on the verge of death because us dumbass kids didn’t know how to treat them properly. It was fun; I liked it as kids do. Of course, the best part was the Scare Games. No kid was gonna turn down funny creatures getting knocked over or thrown out windows.

But I never really “got” it, the way I do now. The Scare Games were fun, it was a nice addendum to Monsters INC, but it wasn’t something that I related to. I mean, obviously. What was there to relate to? No one was getting beaten over the head with cheap toys. Good movie, but not something that was on my mind a lot.

And yet, now that I sit in my apartment, about to graduate, I find myself often scrolling on YouTube and replaying small scenes. The party. Mike getting into his dorm. Scare Games. And of course, the slightly shoed-in tie-in to the original film when they visit the Scare Factory.

It hits different now. The film hasn’t changed; it’s still the same 1h 44m Pixar kids movie. No one snuck into the files and rewrote it. But I’ve changed. And with new eyes, comes new sights to see.

I’ve done those things. Danced on the floor of a dingy frat, moving my feet to the purple lights. Lived in a dorm and walked around this strange new campus, taking it all in. Been at the football games, although admittedly our players aren’t as big (skill issue). Met new people, made new friends, lost a couple here and there. Admittedly the film is missing the key experience of vomiting in your apartment at 3am after a booze-filled night out, but let’s give it some slack, the PG rating crutch is real.

The point is, I’ve gone through what Mike went through. What Sully went through. It’s not just a movie with fun situations that make my little kid brain go “oooh and ahh” at the colors; it’s nostalgia, memories that reflect my own life, moments in time that I hold close to me as I graduate, knowing what I'll lose.

There’s a surprising emotional thread too, that I found more compelling in my rewatch. Mike’s fear of being left behind, of all that work he puts in ultimately being for nought at the very end. That’s a real fear. Not just something hypothetical, but scarily tangible. It’s one that keeps me up at night, whenever I have moments of self-doubt or when a friendship/relationship starts to go sour. Am I doing anything right? Will this even amount to anything in the end?

Now, is it my favorite movie ever? Not even close. That goes to Return of the Jedi. Most relatable? Nope. Tick, Tick…Boom! has my heart in that regard. But hey, it’s up there. Odd? Yes, but I can’t help it.

It just hits different, you know?